“May those who sow in tears reap with shouts of joy.” (Psalm 126:5)
I was in a meeting yesterday where the opening devotion was focused on joy and we were encouraged to think about how joy might be a practice of defiance or resistance. That might seem like an odd way to describe joy, but I’ve been reading more and more who are living out joy in this way. The author and speaker Austin Channing Brown wrote a blog entry a few years ago entitled, “Joy as Resistance,” a phrase coined by the poet Toi Derricotte. In her post, Brown said she saw choosing joy as radical resistance to white supremacy. An excerpt:
“And now I want more, not only as a part of the resistance, but because I am human and my human dignity demands that I, too, experience unadulterated joy. So I am opening my life for a joy as thick as my thighs. A joy that jiggles and wiggles. A joy with some heft and tiger stripes. I want a joy as big as my belly, rolling over on top of itself with abundance. I want a joy that inhabits every curly coil on my head, that’s weaved through every twist, every braid, and yes, every wig. I want a joy as full as my lips, as wide as my nose, as bright as my eyes. I want a joy that tumbles out of me.”
So often, I think, we correlate joy only with feeling happy. But joy is a fuller emotion than that. The psalmist above notes that tears and joy are connected.
I was at a workshop on Monday with pastors who are serving in what are known as “cross-racial/cross-cultural” settings—this is usually a pastor who is a person of color and is serving in a predonimantly white congregation. These can be challenging, tiring contexts. But the day opened with vibrant worship and I was moved to record a bit of a familiar Christmas song led by Pastor Heewon Kim. I can’t explain why I was so inspired by this segment of the worship, but I noticed after I watched the recording that, yes, there is light in this room, but there are also distinct shadows. Singing in the midst of shadows. That’s what joy can be for those who are struggling and worn down. Sowing tears. Reaping with shouts of joy.
